i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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