The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize