why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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