this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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