Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
