We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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