He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Randomize
