Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
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