I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize