i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Are my feet made of real feet?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
