this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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