I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
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