just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
