i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
