He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
