just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
