I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
