the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
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