i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
ugly people sure do ruin things
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
