There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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