He is an equal opportunity slut.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize