Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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