I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
