do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize
