I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I seem to have left my pride at pride
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
