you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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