If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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