She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Randomize
