It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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