: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
