don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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