I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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