Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
You're like the curious george of whores
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
