i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
