Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize
