Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I supernannyed him into submission
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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