i love accidental penises.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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