Buhtt sex?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
