What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
