No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
