booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
my liver is dry heaving
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
