never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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