Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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