Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize