Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
