I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
Randomize
