I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
