I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
