ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize