I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
