You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
